Religion Unlisted

It wasn't a big change on the social media. Privately changing my listed religion from Christian/ Buddhist to simply Buddhist.

The change of heart though... THAT was amazing.

It was this discovery within the last couple weeks that I didn't literally believe in much of the Bible at all. The change really hit my heart when I realized I didn't believe that Jesus Christ is my savior.

Not because I think I'm perfect. Far from it. But what kind of God would make an imperfect being [like myself or the BILLIONS of other people] and then demand perfection? To top that off in order to satisfy that need for perfection, He gives up His only PERFECT Son to quench that thirst?

The whole notion of "sin" has pretty much gone away. Yeah there's laws I keep because they are my truth:

1) I still love/ honor God because I still believe in Him [or Her or It]. I see it in nature.
     I see it in my fellowman. I see it in the heavens. I hear it in a song.
2) I still will endeavor to love my fellowman to the fullest possible capacity

I thought the notion of letting go of Jesus would be a scary thing. I thought I would be afraid of hell and damnation. I'm not. I'm more afraid of what others [my Christian friends and family] would say if they knew. That's a big chunk of people for me.

I don't particularly feel like being preached at [because I know that's what would occur from several people.] I've heard enough Bible pounding for several lifetimes. So for now, while I build my strength and learn some more about my new found belief system, I lay quietly in my faith.

I will confess it is a hard thing to do because I'm usually the one calling people out on their stuff. And there's been plenty of stuff to call people out on, but I cannot explain it to them without there being Another discussion. One which I'm not quite prepared for.

Am I a Christian?

What a sticky question. I would have to say "yes", but I'm certainly not a traditional one.

I believe I'm inherently imperfect. I could live a thousand lives and the result would most likely be that I would mess up a million ways collectively. I believe in a God who is perfect and probably doesn't want to particularly want to see the messes I've made because I would bring mud all over His white house so to speak. So I believe that there has to be something [or someone more accurately] to clean up those messes. That someone to me is Jesus.

The reason why I'm thinking about my own Christianity is a question I had to day in my Bible study: "Is there any part of the Christmas Story that you doubt?"

Well, yeah. I find the virgin birth rather astonishing. Immaculate conception is an awfully big pill to swallow. It wasn't a new tale either. There were tales of Greek gods impregnating mortal women for centuries prior to Jesus' birth.

Here's the thing though... He still lived a damned fine life where he taught to love God and love your fellowman. He taught service was a way to show that love. In that I think Jesus was a pretty good guy. He performed lots of miracles. He lived and died honorably. I think He may have still been able to fill that gap for me.

So yes, I'm a Christian, but I'm rather non-literal. And if the mainstream Christianity knew, it would be rather unpopular.